hey, pine nut.

so, this might be a little intense for a monday morning, but when inspo hits, it feels important to share it ASAP — which means you're lucky this didn't land in yer inbox at around midnight thirty!

buckle up, bloom. we're covering some ground today...

binaries are bullshit + they’ve been baked into our core beliefs for ages

they’re threaded into so many of our foundational teachings so thoroughly that it can be tough to see them for what they are until you’re actively looking for them

consider the current U.S governmental pushback against a spectrum of gender, with legislation that reverts back to a male/female gender binary that denies reality for so many people —

this isn’t just about hate for those who don’t conform to the understandings someone has, or fear of beliefs that differ from their own

and it’s not just about ignorance

sure — a lot of people clinging to a gender binary do it out of hate, and lots more do it out of fear, or willful ignorance

but there are ALSO plenty who do it out of an UNwillful, regular degular ignorance —

and THOSE are the folks we can reach without battling brick wall syndrome

they’re the ones who might actually listen + be able to conceptualize something different

and when THOSE folks get activated — beyond mere education to an illumination of what is unjust here, and how?

THAT’S where real change can take place

THAT’S where numbers will shift in ways that no one can any longer pretend or believe that the hateful are the majority

but it’s going to require MORE than just being able to identify, listen to, and talk with those people, because there’s SOMETHING ELSE at play that needs to be addressed —

a deeply-rooted cultural belief in binaries as a whole

we ALL think in binaries — unless you’ve done BUCKETS of intentional work to disentangle yourself, and even then i don’t know that anyone’s ever completely broken free… yet ;)

binary thinking is a pendulum swing — from one singular side to another

it’s an either/or, never a “both” or “many”

our myths + movies dig the roots deep with every dynamic hero/villain, sinner/saint pairing

our sport keeps us emotionally locked into worlds of winners + losers

the way we parent often revolves around sorting kids into good + bad and doling out rewards or punishments accordingly

the way we care for our health involves increasing the good food on our plates + eliminating the bad, whether we’re being faithful to our health plans or cheating on them

all of these are super common, culturally accepted + encouraged ways of thinking about kids + food + sports + humanity that have been reinforced over time + keep folks in a state of being that ASSUMES a binary

and when everything we’re told over time takes binaryism for granted, it’s easy to lose the ability to recognize how untrue it is (never mind how harmful)

all or nothing, right or wrong, yes or no, truth or lie — so many binaries, yet so many ways our actual experiences exist somewhere in between

and unfortunately, living under an unsuspecting acceptance of binary thinking creates conditions for hate-fueled binaryism to thrive, so it’s time to rip off the binary bandaid + start getting intentional about revealing + witnessing the complex walt whitman multitudes we all contain

another thing to consider, is that folks tend to embrace binaries because they make life easier… on the surface

when there are only two options + you’re clearly told which is the “right” one, you’re liberated from the weight of needing to think for yourself which, admittedly, can be exhausting

religion can hold a similar appeal, allowing folks to outsource some of their decisionmaking to an entity or text they cherish + trust

and listen, when that works it can be lovely

but when it’s broken, when trust is lost or harm is done, it’s time to reevaluate that decision + reclaim that power

the phrase “binaries are bullshit” came to me as i was finishing a section in a free resource i’ve created — a free guide for folks who have an affiliate or referral partner program (or want one)

the section is called “partner support secret sauce”

here’s how it starts:

you may be familiar with the age-old adage: give someone a fish + you feed them for a day. teach them to fish + you feed them for a lifetime

i like to tweak it, ever-so-slightly, to: give someone a fig + you feed them for a day. teach them to farm + you feed them for a lifetime

either way, binaries are bullshit. and the logic that makes us choose to either give or teach is a stenchy vestige of the ingrained binary thinking + patriarchal colonial madness that has no place in a world of my making

imagine, if you will, what might happen if you dared to be so bold as to give them the fig AND teach them to farm?

if you meet the immediate need so no one’s distracted by their own hunger, and THEN ALSO make sure they know how to help themselves going forward… you allow people the dignity of being whole — cared for AND capable

when you bust default binary thinking, you shake up deep-seated indoctrination which, much like feeding someone a fig + then teaching them to farm, helps them now AND going forward, with dignity

did anything land here for you? was there something you thought could have been made more clear? something you particularly did or did not agree with?

you know i’d love to know!

thanks for taking the ride with me, bloom

xxoo, cc

ps: want that free affiliate partner support guide i mentioned? hit reply + i’ll send it over just as soon as it’s done-done lol

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