hey, bloom.

yesterday i encouraged a client to do this during our YEAR AHEAD spread — to “celebrate + grieve”

i suggested that a deeper honoring of what wants to be celebrated may in fact come through honoring the things that want to be grieved as well

when i saw the first post about the ceasefire in gaza today, my instinct was to keep scrolling, to find more evidence that it was true

when i was convinced it was, i turned to searching for corroboration that it would likely be followed through on, that it wasn’t just a slick-sounding statement to satisfy + lull

afraid to trust it, afraid to be fooled

and then wanting to celebrate. REALLY wanting to

but finding it impossible to do so without thinking of so many lives lost, so much destruction, so much unfathomable indecency + injustice for so damn long

how to celebrate it taking so long to get here?

on a personal level, sure… we can speak of things like divine timing + peace with your pace around things like hitting a milestone, accomplishing a goal, leaving a job or an ex or the like —

but there’s nothing divine about a timing that results in so much criminal loss of life

no peace with a pace that hides behind manufactured fear + systemically-perpetuated greed

crushed by the irreconcilable heft of so many for whom the unthinkable proved so easily negotiable —

i felt stuck, at a loss

i thought the videos of palestinian kiddos joyfully jumping + wooping in celebration might help me access a bit of that joy too

instead it unlocked a deep well of sadness + anger, a wailing i wasn’t able to contain

and too a not knowing how to not burst at such simple human goodness in the face of so much devastating inhumanity

how to comprehend such unbridled hope in so much darkness?

and then i remembered this call, to celebrate + grieve

and i remembered my own damn directive, to claim joy like it’s your job, because it is — even when it’s really fucking hard

and i remembered that our celebrations can look how we need them to

that we can grieve our way through them, just as we can celebrate through our grief

that life is sometimes as beautiful as it is hard

that being with both is as tough as it is a gift

and that's what feels important to share right now

lots of love, sweet bloom

xxoo, cc

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